living on the edge

I met Wes at a bar and he’s probably one of few people I initiated flirt at a bar. As an introvert and someone who does not take risks, going up to a cute guy at a bar can be a nightmare, but  alcohol can make it easier.

This bar had an outdoor area, which was more open and relaxing instead of dark and loud music inside. He was talking to a friend of mine, which was a perfect opportunity for me to introduce myself while I have a safe conversation with my friend. As an ice breaker, I complimented his black leather jacket which was uber sexy on him but not in a leather daddy way.

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He appeared cocky from his sarcastic humor but easy to talk to when I throw shade back at him. Wes was same age as me, white, auburn-ish hair, about 2 inches taller than me with a nice build.

I invited him over to my place and while I was driving, he demanded to give me a road job. I have never done this and I was terrified, not for the reason of getting caught, but to make sure I was driving carefully. I declined but definitely enjoyed it once we arrived at our place. He spent the night and in the morning, he gave me his phone number.

After few dates, I went over to his place. He lived in a tiny studio with mauve carpet that looked like a scene of a 70’s porn video. He also had a tarantula spider as a pet.. clearly has no fear and takes risks. 

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After showing me around his apartment, he became sexually aggressive. Again, he became very verbal and while it can be hot watching it on porn, it was somewhat intimidating to me. As much as I had found him incredibly attractive, I was uncomfortable with this, but I think that made him even more persistent and I persistently declined. We stopped talking after that.

Few years later, I ran into him on the street. I asked if he wanted to grab a drink but he apparently developed a drinking problem and has been working on his sobriety for almost a year. He then invited me over to his new apartment, which was not 70’s porn scene. He definitely upgraded to modern decor and that made me so turned on. I made efforts to give him a BJ but he declined. He said he wanted to be a good boy. Does that mean I am a bad boy?

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