friends with benefits

If you read “Bros befo hoes 2” on July 19, I wrote about Liam, whom I met through my friend Taylor. Few years ago, I went to a bar with Liam and Taylor. I met Shamus there. So keep up with me here. Taylor liked both Liam and Shamus. Liam and Shamus dated. And now I am about to do ‘bros befo hoes 3’ on Shamus. We should just have a big orgy and call it a day.

Shamus is 4 years younger than me, white, about my height and an average build. He sorta reminded me of Ron (See St. Valentines vs. Buddha). Shamus and I exchanged phone numbers and he called me the very next day. We met up for ice cream and for almost 2 hours, we did not stop conversing.


We went out on few dates and one night when Shamus and I were hanging out at his place, Taylor texted Shamus what he was up to. Shamus looked at me with a suspicion I had something to do with it. “Why is Taylor texting me? He never texts me.” This got me all paranoid. Taylor knew that I like Shamus so is Taylor purposely trying to sabotage it? Is there something between them that I am completely clueless about? He did reply the message to Taylor “I will be catching up on my sleep.” Then we had sex that night. 

In the morning, we cuddled in his tiny twin bed and I was smiling head to toe. If you are a coffee addict, I think you can relate to the panic when Shamus said he did not have coffee at his place. So he ran to a coffee place to bring me my morning fix. Then he made banana pancakes. 


These small gestures gave me reassurance that we were dating.

One night, we went to a gay bar, where lot of our mutual friends, including Taylor and Liam, spend weekends at. It’s a two level venue where you can check out the first floor from the upper level. While I was getting a drink from the upstairs bar, I saw Shamus talking to a guy downstairs. I tried not to be a crazy jealous chick but I obsessively monitored him. After witnessing them have a make out session, I made an abrupt exit.


Within minutes my cell phone vibrated.

“Where are you?” Shamus asked.

“I am on my way home.”

“Are you ok?” He probably realized what he did made me upset.

“I am fine….. (silence) ……..  Shamus, how do you view… us?”

“Ummm… I think we’re friends.”

“What kind of friends?”

“Just friends…..I am sorry. I should have said something. I just assumed that you knew. I am sorry for not being clear.”

“Well, it is definitely clear now. Good night.”

Maybe he just wanted to be FWB, but I wanted full benefits including medical coverage and two weeks of vacation. Besides, morning cuddle and banana pancakes in bed with coffee are not the usual deal in a FWB package and I did’t get the clear memo he only wanted to be friends.


About a year later, I went to meet up few friends at a bar and there was Shamus talking to my friends when I walked in.


Alright, you might think I was the angry bitter jealous guy, but honestly, I was able to talk to Shamus without bitch slapping him. My friends asked how we knew each other, which created an awkward silence. He then acknowledge he was an asshole to me. I think that gave me some closure. 

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